Post-it Notes protrude from most of my books and notebooks {marking favorite quotes and things I want to return to again}. I place them for the sake of easy {future} retrieval–but–without a doubt, they eventually fall off. Have you noticed that? They transfer to the bottom of shoes, the elbows of sweaters, or to the dreaded “black-hole”…… Continue reading Generous Love: Disrupting a “Me” Centered Theology
This is an open confession: I often wrestle with the desire to see my hopes and dreams fulfilled according to my timeline. I get the lack of trust in that confession. Really. But it’s true. I have a lack of patience that rises up when things don’t go according to my plan. This impatience quickly turns into discouragement.…… Continue reading A Call to Action
Inadequacies, mistakes, failures and fears regularly find their way into my thoughts. Not measuring up—not being enough—have been reoccurring thoughts for as long as I can remember. They are so familiar they can creep in and linger undetected. In elementary school I distinctly remember wanting to read, write and draw like Grace Su. She could do…… Continue reading Play Your Note
“I have good news and bad news.” As I drove the stretch of road, I struggled to make sense of his words…the diagnosis, suggested course of treatment, and steps of immediate action. Osteo~what? I hung up the phone and attempted to sort out the information the doctor shared—understanding would have to come later. Then it hit…… Continue reading Clean Out the Wound
Immature. Cranky. Obsessive. Silly. I’ve been assigned these labels over the course of my years, and I can own them all. In fact, I may even be comfortable with them. I mean, isn’t it just easier to be the person you’ve always been; to walk in the path already cleared and worn – to embrace an identity others expect? I…… Continue reading A Tale of Two Identities
With the last push {in my final delivery}, I believe I birthed my brain. Honestly. She said placenta which must have been code for: recall, memory, and all connected, logical thoughts. I track random pieces of fuzz adrift in my house. I stop to pick split ends {for 5 minutes and sometimes much longer} in the…… Continue reading Divided Attention
The rodeo–always a fun {slightly concerning} family affair. On a recent trip, while watching the mutton busting, cue obnoxious cheering that embarrassed our teenagers {parent win}, and shamelessly adoring the little darlings holding on for dear life–I couldn’t help but notice the sheep {already ridden} congregating in a corner of the large arena. It was fascinating and…… Continue reading Ears to Hear and the Will to Follow
Blindsided. Never saw it coming. Ever uttered those words? There is deep vulnerability assumed in such responses–evidenced by the undertone of surprise. I like to plan–you know–keep things nice and tidy. If possible, I’d do this with every area of my life. Emotions, faith, disappointments, friendships, etc. Keep things under control. A few weekends ago, while attending…… Continue reading A Story, A Question and A Crossroad
We all have one. It shapes our decisions and perceptions. Our relationship filters include them. Backstory: a narrative providing a history or background context… Without discipline, knowledge of another’s backstory can lead to prejudices, or unwarranted judgments. In selfishness–or self-preservation–we can use another’s backstory to justify our own actions. For example, if you happen to feel…… Continue reading Backstory
It was the intersection of my guilt and the Lord’s prompting. My breathing became shallow and my heart thumped wildly. With everything in me, I didn’t like where this was leading. It’s a moment I won’t soon forget. Jesus was directing me to confess my failure—to Him…and to someone I wronged. Confession. There’s something we…… Continue reading The Liberating Power of Confession
Alyssa DeLosSantos 